The beauty about this phrase, '3 Steps forward 1 Step Back' is that at least there is progress, right? Right! It is this forward progress that keeps me sane. Why I bring this up is because I will think things are going well (as well as expected for a 5 week old, new parents and recovering mom), but then I'll have a bad day, or two in this case, and it really sets me back.
Overall, my c section recovery is indeed feeling tons better. I won't be running any marathons or really even doing anything super effort driven, but I am feeling much more like myself. Granted sweats are still my pant of choice since that tender c section area is still TENDER. I haven't dared drink a carbonated drink yet either since my digestive system is still acting weird from the surgery. This has been a part of the recovery that has seemed the slowest - just getting those traumatized systems back up and running smoothly. Some of the worst pain of recovery was that first week and trying to use the bathroom - YOWZA! Those of you that have been through it know what I'm talking about - Double YOWZA :) So the last two yucky days weren't about c sec recovery since while it sometimes feels a little slow, I think that is going ok.
So if it wasn't c section recovery... what was it...On Monday the whole breastfeeding thing took a PAINFUL turn. Up until this point it has been going alright for someone that is clueless about breastfeeding. My goal was to breastfeed for at least the first two weeks since that is the scientifically proven 'Golden' period of breastfeeding. This golden period means you get the baby through its most vulnerable period with your antibodies that come from your milk. Anyway, since that was going alright I decided to set my new goal to 6 weeks since I had already put some effort into it for the first 2 weeks. This past Monday has me thinking I might throw in the towel on breastfeeding though. It was so painful to feed him I was crying. I was googling and reading my books about what possibly could be wrong. I called around and there was a whole lot of doctors telling me to call other doctors with no real answers.... urgh... After being quite frustrated I called a lactation consultant finally. She was helpful but didn't really give me any *new* information. I really started wondering if the benefits of breastfeeding at this stage outweigh the challenges (at least in my case). Assuming you have a healthy baby the long term effects of breastmilk versus formula start to be somewhat negligible. Breastmilk will always be superior (it is nature's creation) but not by much. In the back of my mind I am always thinking.." Happy Mom means Happy Baby " and so if the stress of breastfeeding takes to much of a toll it probably isn't helping baby. (stressors include... possible yeast infections, dietary requirements that could be affecting baby, scheduling commitment, etc.) That being said, by Tuesday I felt a bit better by trying some home remedies, but I am still heavily considering trying to wean. Part of me is ready to have my body back and pain free... I know a little selfish :(
When I say pain free it is because following that horrible Monday I woke up on Tuesday with the worst headache. I took stuff for it and it wouldn't go away. It was there all day even after i slept for 2 hours once Kevin got home. My patience level for pain and being uncomfortable was reaching its limit.
Now it is Wed. Nathaniel is sleeping and I can blogplain (haha I can complain and get things off my chest by blogging them - blogplain). The silver lining to all of this is that Nathaniel is doing well and I love being around him all day :) He is even smiling and getting excited at certain points during the day now. It is so cute. My headache did go away when he was cute and looking at me smiling. He is becoming so much more aware of his surroundings. His most happy time of day is right before Kevin leaves for work so Kevin gets to take in all of the cuteness right before he leaves. Unfortunately, since the happy periods are somewhat short as compared to the fussy periods it never fails that when Kevin leaves Nathaniel runs out of *happy* time, but he gets more *happy* times throughout the day. What is funny is when you change his diaper that is when he sometimes smiles the most. Sometimes I think the smiling is a distraction so that he can then pee on everything without you being prepared with a new diaper- little boys little boys :)
Side Note: I put Nathaniel in his car seat and lifted it into the car all by myself today. This is huge because I haven't really been able to lift much until now. Granted I couldn't carry that much weight for very long without my stomach muscles feeling pinched, but it is a start. We went through the sbux drive thru and then on a fall leaf peeping drive. He was a little fussy and the car ride put him to sleep so I drove around a bit. Here is the catch though. if he isn't asleep he cries every time (I mean EVERY time) you stop the car. This makes red lights and long lines at a drive thru my enemy. I've said it before, but I'll say it again... Nathaniel is quite the DIVO.
Well, I just hope the rest of my week goes better. It was nice to have a friend come over Monday night - I was a little flakey due to a long day, but regardless just having her visit made me feel better.
No comments:
Post a Comment